We all know that caregiving is complex. The role comes with a variety of tasks and challenges, many of which intersect with each other. One aspect is caring for a disabled senior. By disabled, we’re referring to seniors with a physical or mental condition that limits their ability to participate in some aspects of life.
The issue is common among seniors, with close to 50% of those aged 75 or older having some type of disability.
The presence of a disability adds another layer to the caregiving journey. So, today, we’re looking at tips to help you care for disabled seniors, ones that can make your journey a little easier. There isn’t a one-size-fits-all solution here. As with most aspects of caregiving, it’s a matter of choosing the approaches that are most relevant to you.
Caregiving Tips and Approaches
Understand Their Needs and Preferences
First, disabilities aren’t all-encompassing. Most people with a disability can still do some things for themselves. They might even be able to do a decent amount and just be limited in a few areas.
This is why it’s crucial to learn about the senior. What are their specific needs and limitations? What can they do for themselves? What can they do with assistance? What needs to be done for them?
Talk To Their Doctor
The senior’s doctor could be your first port of call. They’ll be able to tell you about the senior’s disability, including how this might progress over time and what the senior’s current needs are.
Crucially, the doctor will be able to suggest things the senior should try to do and things they shouldn’t. Their recommendations may sometimes be different than the senior’s perspectives or your assumptions.
For example, if the senior struggles to stand up after sitting, they might want to avoid standing as much as possible – perhaps leading to you waiting hand and foot on them. Yet, seniors who struggle to stand often need to keep pushing themselves or the needed muscles may weaken further, making standing even more difficult.
Talk to the Senior
The senior’s health needs are only part of the equation, which is why it’s important to talk to the senior directly as well.
Such conversations need to be approached gently, as many people don’t like talking about their limitations. The idea of relying on family for assistance can also be frustrating and embarrassing for seniors, perhaps leading to increased resistance to the topic.
It may help to talk about how you hope to preserve the senior’s autonomy. Notably, if the senior is helped with the things they can’t (or shouldn’t) do themselves, they will have more capacity for the things they want to do.
Create and Maintain a Care Plan
Care plans are ever-evolving documents that cover a person’s current medical conditions, how they’re being treated, and other considerations for care. They’re powerful because they contain a large amount of information all in one place.
A care plan makes it easy to fill others in on the senior’s current challenges and needs. The plan could help you to remember too, especially if there’s a lot going on.
Once the plan has been made, you’ll need to update it regularly to account for any changes to the senior’s health or medications.
Watch for Changes
Even if the senior’s disability isn’t progressive, you’ll need to look out for changes in their capacity and any signs of health issues.
For example, a senior’s balance may decrease over time, which raises their risk of a fall. To keep them safe, look for ways to decrease fall risk around the home, like removing trip hazards and installing grab bars.
Some changes may require a trip to the doctor’s office for their guidance and perhaps a prescription change.
Encourage Physical Activity
Most of the time, a disability shouldn’t mean a senior becomes inactive. Regular physical activity is still crucial for promoting health.
Gentle yoga, walking, swimming, and light gardening are all good options. The senior’s doctor will be able to tell you which types of exercise are healthy and safe.
It’s often helpful to exercise with the senior. Doing so provides gentle encouragement and social support. Some seniors may also be more responsive to the idea of walking with you than you telling them they need to exercise more.
Find Available Assistance
Don’t fall into the trap of trying to do it all yourself.
Caregiving is much too big for one person. It’s much better to look for help early, often, and from many sources. The following are some important areas to consider:
- Financial Support. Government programs, insurance, or even family members may be able to help with some of the financial aspects of caregiving.
- Hands-on Support. Friends and family can often help with the practical side of caregiving, perhaps even looking after the senior periodically to help share the load. Hiring a professional caregiver is a valuable idea too, particularly if other people can’t help with care.
- Social and Emotional Support. Seniors and caregivers both need external support to balance the challenges of the situation. For caregivers, meeting friends regularly and attending caregiver support groups can be powerful approaches. Seniors may turn to events at local senior centers and community centers. Many places will even offer transport or other forms of support for disabled seniors.
Also, it’s best to take a broad approach when looking for assistance. This means you shouldn’t be just looking for caregiving support. Look for any type of practical, financial, or social support that will make your life easier.
Anything that saves you time or energy will ultimately help with caregiving, by decreasing your stress levels and giving you some breathing space.
Make Sure They’re Connected Socially
Isolation is an issue for many seniors. Being disabled can make this even worse, as it becomes more challenging to get out and connect with people.
Of course, staying socially connected is still very possible. Doing so simply takes a little more work. Try talking to people at a local senior center for ideas, as most will offer programs that keep seniors connected and engaged.
If getting out is extremely difficult, you might consider getting friends and family to visit instead. Video calling technology is useful too, helping people to connect no matter where they live.
Remember your own needs here too. You need social connections of your own, ones that help you feel validated and give you a life beyond the caregiving role.
Consider Higher Education
Strange as it may sound, higher education can help you support a disabled senior.
These days, many universities and online platforms offer related courses, such as those in gerontology, healthcare management, or psychology. You could even take your education further, perhaps with a partly related qualification, like an associates degree in health administration.
Such education won’t provide much hands-on information about caregiving but does give you insights about the systems you’re working with. You may even be able to use such education to start a new career path in the future.
More than that, higher education can help you broaden your identity. It gives you something to look at and focus on that is distinct from any caregiving role. Having something like this is crucial for keeping you sane.
Plan for the Future
Planning for the future is crucial, yet also easily overlooked.
Many of us choose to focus on the present instead, often because there’s already a lot going on and thinking about the future can be scary.
Yet, some decisions should be discussed long before it is time to make them. And, for things like advance care planning and long-term care insurance, it’s best to get the paperwork started early.
Another reason for planning is that some conversations and decisions are emotionally charged, such as talking about how the senior wants to die and whether assisted living is an option in the future.
Talking about topics early allows you to choose the best time and situation for conversations. There’s enough time for each person to navigate through the emotions and other complexities, and you can keep things as gentle as possible.
If you wait, you risk trying to have these conversations in the middle of a very difficult situation.
For example, a senior might end up needing to fill out paperwork and make decisions about their end of life when they’re very ill. This can be incredibly stressful for everyone, especially if the senior is having difficulty concentrating. Don’t forget about all the emotions that come with this stage either, including anticipatory grief.
As well as advance care planning and insurance, think about wills, estate planning, and financial planning here. The more you can work out about the future now, the easier things become later.
Also consider, what happens if the senior’s care needs increase beyond your ability to support them. Would they move to a facility? Would you hire someone? How would you pay for the extra support they need?
Final Thoughts
As you’ve probably guessed, most of the challenges we’ve discussed are relevant to all seniors, not just those with a disability. The presence of a disability simply adds another layer, giving caregivers something else to think about.
Still, it’s often just a matter of stepping through the various challenges, researching and planning as you go. While the situation can seem confusing and overwhelming at first, it quickly becomes familiar and even routine.
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