Throwing an Inclusive Party for Family and Friends

Inclusive is a word that gets used a lot these days, so much so that the concept can be a little confusing. At its heart, inclusivity focuses on creating safe environments, ones that are judgment-free and support the needs of everyone attending.

In the context of sexual orientation and gender, an inclusive party is one where people can act authentically with their sexual and gender orientation. Seniors attending the event may need to be coached to ensure they know which behaviors are appropriate and which are not.

Inclusivity also relates to physical and mental limitations. Here, an inclusive party is one that a person with physical and/or mental limitations could still attend and enjoy. This requires additional planning, especially when seniors have mobility challenges, incontinence, or dementia.

Here are some crucial tips for creating an inclusive event, regardless of who’s attending.

How to Throw an Inclusive Party

Determine the Special Needs Present

To make your party truly inclusive, you’ll need to understand what specific needs are present. Ideally, this should be done when you first start planning for the party, so there’s time to make any changes you need to.

If one or more seniors are attending, ask family members and/or caregivers as well as the senior. Caregivers will often have a good sense of the senior’s needs – and they’ll be less resistant to answering embarrassing questions.

Areas to think about include:

• Dietary needs. Do you need some dairy free, gluten free, vegan, and/or nut free options?
• Type of Seating. Do some people need specific types of seats, like raised seats or ones with armrests? Having a variety of seating types helps solve this issue.
• Where People Sit. Some guests may do better in specific places, such as seated near the bathrooms or a little distance from the main event. Think about these needs beforehand, especially if you’re using designated seating.
• Lighting. The environment should be well-lit so that people can see, but avoid harsh lighting, as this can be glaring and uncomfortable.
• Sound. Some guests may struggle to hear, while others may be sensitive to too much input. Finding the right balance may require some flexibility and experimentation.
• Signage. Labeling everything clearly makes things less confusing. This includes the different types of food and important locations, like the bathrooms.
• Activities. Make sure activities accommodate people of varying skill levels, so that no one is left out.
• The Amount of Stimulation. If a guest is sensitive to stimulation, too much noise, conversation, lighting, or physical activity could become overwhelming. You can get around this by creating a quieter and calmer event. Alternatively, you might prepare a specific room that is less stimulating and offers gentle activities. This gives people a place to go without needing to leave the venue.      
• The Date and Time. Events during the day, like a lunch barbecue, are often easier for seniors. A day event may even be crucial if the senior has dementia, as many experience sundowning, where they are often confused and agitated in the evenings. 

Include Loved Ones in Your Party Planning

It’s tempting to plan your party alone, this way you choose exactly how things go and don’t need to debate with anyone. But, it’s also easy to miss things when you’re planning alone.

Family and friends may also have access to information that can help you make wise decisions.

For instance, if you are planning to propose to your partner, a best friend, sibling, or parent may know the type of wedding engagement ring style your future fiancée prefers. This is important as, these days, choosing a ring can be quite hard. Classic styles like Princess cuts are competing with fancy Asscher cut diamonds, colored gemstones, and vintage styles, giving you many options to choose between.

Including people in the planning also helps them to feel a part of the experience. This may improve their experience at the party too, as they may be excited about how everyone else reacts to the event.

Plus, when the senior’s involved in planning, they can easily speak up about what they need, like where they’d like to sit and which foods appeal to them. This is much easier than trying to guess what they might want.

Choose a Theme Everyone Will Love

Universal themes such as those based on the seasons or nature appeal to guests of all ages. This makes them likely to resonate with all your guests.

Selecting a theme that is too specific or unexpected can make some guests feel left out, so make sure to pick wisely and make the most of this theme for all your guests.

Select games, singing, dancing, or other activities that people of all ages will enjoy. Also think about your party favors carefully. Ensure that each guest receives something they can actually use or will enjoy keeping at home.

You could also consider writing each guest a personalized message, so they feel that they are special to you.

Present Media in Various Formats

If you will be showing a video during a special part of your event, make sure it is accessible.

This includes ensuring there are subtitles so that those with hearing difficulties can still understand your video’s message. If someone will be singing or giving a speech, try to have a sign language interpreter on site.

If you have guests with visual difficulties, ensure that visual images are explained in sound and take time to offer guests a front row seat, so they can see the visuals with greater clarity.

Also, make sure that guests in wheelchairs have an uninterrupted view of any action taking place onstage or on the dance floor. It’s easy for seniors to feel left out if they can’t see or engage with what’s happening.

Should The Senior Attend?

The approaches we’ve discussed help to make events more inclusive, allowing many more people to attend.

Even so, there are only so many changes you can make without compromising your planned event. You may also find that the event is too much for the senior – no matter what you do.

This raises the question, should the senior attend at all?

Many people will default to ‘yes’ as the answer here. After all, family events often celebrate something important, like a marriage or a 60th birthday party. They’re also the chance to connect and celebrate together. Leaving the senior out might feel disrespectful or even mean.

Yet, large events can be too much for some people, especially those with significant health issues or cognitive limitations. The process of traveling to the event and getting situated may be exhausting all on its own. Then there’s the event itself and getting home again.

Seniors with dementia or some other cognitive limitation may not even fully understand what’s happening, which simply adds to the stress.

For seniors who struggle this much, you might need to re-assess. Consider whether the event is the best approach. Perhaps it would be better to have a small separate low-key celebration that involves them. Doing so would allow you to make a fully customized event, instead of trying to meet everyone’s needs at the same time.

Final Thoughts

With care and consideration, you can tailor most events to make them a better fit for seniors. The first step is simply awareness. Often, just thinking about what the senior might need will provide insights about the types of changes to consider.

Try not to stress too much as you go through the planning process. It’s almost impossible to account for every person’s needs, especially as some needs may conflict with others. There may also be unforeseen events that turn everything upside down. That’s simply how things go.

So, do the best you can and don’t stress too much about the parts that aren’t perfect.