What To Do When Aging Parents Can’t Safely Drive

Adult children often worry about their aging parents, especially when it comes to driving. It’s hard not to, as their eyesight and reaction time often decrease as the senior gets older.

At what point does driving become unsafe for them? And, what happens if they keep driving anyway and get into an accident? What does this mean for them and for you?

The discussion in this article is for information purposes only and does not represent legal advice. It’s important to consult a lawyer, as your location and specific circumstances will impact liability.

Who Is Legally Responsible For An Accident?

Most of the time, if the senior causes a driving accident, they’ll be held legally responsible.

After all, they’re adults and decided to get in the car and drive, despite the risks. Adult children certainly aren’t responsible for the decisions of stubborn but mentally competent parents.

Things are trickier if the senior isn’t considered mentally competent, particularly if they have been diagnosed with dementia. Here, they might not fully understand their illness or their driving capacity, leading to poor decision-making.

In this case, you could be held responsible if you allow the senior to continue driving.

There may also be some cases where you’re held responsible for a mentally competent senior. This is most likely if you know they’re unsafe behind the wheel and make no attempt to stop them from driving (especially if you’re providing care and support in other areas of their life).

How to Protect Your Aging Parents

Of course, it’s better for everyone if the senior never gets into an accident to begin with. So, how can you keep them safe?

Have an Honest Conversation

Up-front and honest conversations are the best place to begin. This includes talking about reasons you think the senior’s driving ability is slipping and alternative ways they can get around.

It’s important to be compassionate here, as driving represents independence for many people. Driving makes it easy to get around, to visit friends, and to have their own lives. Losing this can be a huge blow, which is why some people will continue to drive even when doing so is unsafe.

You may need to get other people involved in the conversation to highlight your concerns. For example, you might get the senior’s doctor to talk to them about their current limitations, like how their eyesight is decreasing or issues with their reaction time.

Problem-solving is often an important part of this conversation.

If the senior can’t drive anymore, how else can they get around? Are there solutions that still provide some sense of independence? What about using multiple approaches, like rides from family members, plus public transport and taxis?

You may find success by taking a collaborative approach to this issue. This involves trying to solve the problem with the senior, instead of simply telling them what they can and can’t do.

Get a Medical Assessment

A full medical assessment provides valuable insights into the senior’s health and how their health may change over time. You could even ask the doctor for specific details about the senior’s ability to drive safely.

In some cases, the medical assessment may suggest the senior should stop driving immediately. Other times, they might be fine to drive right now, but there could be health issues to watch out for in the future.

Consider Changes

For some seniors, stopping driving is the only safe option. But, others may still be able to safely drive with some changes.

For example, perhaps new glasses and an updated prescription is enough to keep the senior safe on the road. Or, the senior might be able to safely drive during the day on local roads, but not at night or on the freeway.

However, it’s important to be realistic here and keep an eye out for changes. Even if the senior can safely drive with modifications now, they mightn’t always be able to do so.

Also remember that it’s best to get the senior off the road before there’s an accident. That means stopping them from driving when issues are just beginning, rather than waiting until their driving is seriously impaired.   

Intervene

Some adult children choose to intervene to prevent their aging parents from driving. This could involve reporting them to the DMV, hiding the keys, even selling their car.

Doing so makes it difficult, if not impossible, for the senior to drive.

This is something to think carefully about, as there are some ethical and legal debates here. Notably, do you have the right to prevent someone from driving if they’re still legally competent?

The answer is likely to depend on where you live and how dangerous the senior is behind the wheel. For example, if a medical condition severely impacts their ability to drive, you may be considered negligent if you allow them to drive

Another option is a Motor Vehicle Power of Attorney, which is a specific variation of Power of Attorney (PoA). Having such authority allows adult children to make legal decisions about the senior’s vehicle and everything related to driving.

Because of these complexities, it’s best to consult an attorney before making any decisions. 

If you live in the state of Texas, you may consider hiring a Personal injury attorney in Houston to help you acquire a Motor Vehicle Power of Attorney or to answer any specific driving-related questions. There are similar attorneys in other locations too, ones that can help you understand your legal rights and the best ways to intervene.

If You Can, Start Slowly

If the senior is still currently capable of driving, then consider trying to gradually make them less dependent on their car. This could include using public transport more, walking to local venues, and seeing what services are in the area.

Such approaches can help seniors to get used to life without a car.

Breaking them into the idea gradually like this may make the idea of not driving easier to accept. Some seniors may even find they enjoy getting around in other ways.

Are Seniors More Prone to Car Accidents?

The short answer here is yes. Older adults have a greater risk of crashing per mile traveled compared to younger drivers, plus issues with cognition or changing physical health can have considerable negative impacts on driving safety.

Some changes in cognition or reaction time can be difficult to spot at first, meaning the senior’s safety behind the wheel may gradually decrease without anyone noticing.

However, it’s important to be nuanced here.

Senior drivers do have decades of experience behind the wheel and are often driving shorter distances than younger drivers. Both aspects help with their safety.

Cognition and physical ability can also be very different between drivers. Some seniors will even be completely safe on their road and might even be better drivers than their younger counterparts.

The research into senior driving risk isn’t even as clear cut as you might imagine, reinforcing the importance of considering the individual person, rather than treating all seniors the same.

Crashes Are Riskier

There’s another factor too – if a senior does get in an accident, their risk of death or serious injury is higher. This is the result of frailty and isn’t a pattern they can avoid by simply being more cautious.

This is a good reason to get seniors out of the driver’s seat early.

When Should Seniors Stop Driving?

There’s no specific age at which people should stop driving. Some people are even still driving in their 90s or beyond. The timing entirely comes down to the senior’s capabilities.

Here are some warning sides to watch out for:

• There have been multiple close calls, tickets, or traffic warnings.
• You feel uncomfortable when the senior is driving. Other family members may feel similarly or even avoid getting in the car with the senior.
• The senior is periodically confused or disoriented. This may include getting lost in their own neighborhood, either when they’re driving or even just walking.
• You notice issues that may make driving more difficult, like regular forgetfulness, eyesight difficulties, or decreased reaction time.
• There may be unexplained dings or scratches on the car.
• Their medications are causing significant side effects.

Final Thoughts

Vigilance is crucial when it comes to aging parents and driving.

Many won’t want to give up their license and may not even notice the gradual changes that make them unsafe as a driver.

Sometimes, having gentle conversations can be enough to steer them in a safer direction. Other times, a direct intervention might be the only way to keep them off the road.